I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
