Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
