what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
