I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
