Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
