you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
