Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
My life is pants optional.
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