You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
