does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Someone signed my nipple.
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