remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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