problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
