Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
