i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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