She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
