your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize