i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
