PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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