U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
