Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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