BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
