Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Randomize
