Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
