3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
