just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
he shaved USA in his pubs
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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