duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
