We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
