STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
