why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
