remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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