If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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