butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
