Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
