if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
