I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
