I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
