Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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