I must be too annoying 4 u.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
