My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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