I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
So vagazzling was a success
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