Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
