haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
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