Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
