you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
