giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
you made out with another girl for some wings
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
