high people should be assigned attendants
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
