I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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