yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
