i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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