i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
