If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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