No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
